The Audio Stylings of Chris Levens
"I'm a Gangster"

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I think it would be cool to be a knight.

And, we all think it would be cool to be a knight.

But since we all can't be knights we try to replace our knight-desires with other, less substancial things like love, success, power, buffets. But as we all know too well, nothing will ever satisfy us until we are knights.

Man, it sucks not being a knight.
 9:38 AM   •  7 satisfied customers!!  

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Teridactiles are alive! I could prove it to you if I knew how to put pictures on my blog. If I had the smarts I would show you something amazing. No, I wouldn't bother showing you the picture of the teridactile snatching my sister's baby from her arms, though that one is a gem. Nor would I show you the picture of the teridactile and the candybar. No, to prove their existence beyond a shadow of a doubt I would show you a picture of the tostada-size teridactile crap on the hood of my car-- Q.E.D. baby!

On the lighter side of life, I gave myself a mocca this morning. I said, "John, you've been such a hard worker this week. Today, I'm giving you a mocca." Then I said, "Awe, John, you don't have to do that. You know that being a hard worker is reward in and of itself. I don't need a mocca." Then I got offended and snapped, "I don't appreciate people throwing my gifts back in my face. Exspecially from myself." Well, needless to say, I was rebuked, took the mocca and went to the office with my tail between my legs. I feel real bad. I'm suposed to have lunch with myself this afternoon but I'm not sure I want to. I've never snapped at myself like that and I want some time to myself for awhile. How do I tell myself that I need some time to think? I still like my self and want to spend the rest of my life with myself. Well, at least I think I do. Man, this is tough. Funny how one little snap can make you doubt the value of one personality. I'm starting to think that scitzofrenia (you know what I'm trying to spell) may be the best bet for a little while.
 9:10 AM   •  12 satisfied customers!!  

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Spring, it is so pretty. Makes me want to take off my shoes and run through the field. Makes me glad to be alive. Then that makes me sad, because death smacks me on the face. Death is so convincing, so dominate, so hard. Then that makes me happy, because the resurrection lifts up my head. The resurrection is so unknown, so anticipated, so promised. From there I will remain happy, death will be dead.
 10:57 AM   •  1 satisfied customer!  

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I just errased a post. Ever done that? Ever think you are going to write something so moving that your blog will become a screen play or something? Me either. But I do re-read my stuff and say, "Dang nigger! That stuff sucks!" This really chaps my hide because I'm half honkey. Then I erase it and write about how it sucks and the way I beat myself up with racial slurs. Then I question the taste of using harsh racial slurs on myself in public. But then I strengthen my resolve with the freedom of spech, which leads to a question of freedom verses tact. They end in mutual destruction and all that is left is a wounded paragraph. But out of the ashes of war a new resolve springs up and asserts the value of the past and pleads not to erase or change history. Honest journalism is praised and a presentation of the facts as they are, regardless of freedom or taste, wins the day. And so I leave you with what has happened. What is erased is erased; what remains, remains. Who am I to alter my blog?
 10:59 AM   •  9 satisfied customers!!  

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The Rambler asked, "how fine or great do you think the line between ethics and aesthetics is?" Interesting question. We need to break down the question into two seperate questions: how much different are they AND how much different should they be? These are two different question: one is descriptive and the other prescriptive. I think the difference is small, in a descriptive sense. Most people say something is bad based upon what they like or dislike. This is why ethical standards change so often. Tastes change, ethics change. I think murder can be included also. This sort of ethical theory is sometimes called Emotivism or Boo-Horray. If you like some action, you say it is good, or horray; if you dislike it, you say it is bad, Boo. Right and wrong become expressions of taste or emotions.

But just because this is the way it is, doesn't mean it is the way it should be. But I'm affraid it is the way it will be until this creation is rolled-up like a scroll. The person who will do the rolling-up of this creation has His own tastes, or aesthetics, that he can and will enforce. If we disagree with His tastes he will play the roll of the ultimate snob and will punish us eternally for our bad taste.
 11:47 AM   •  8 satisfied customers!!  

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Sometimes when you think, it is ugly. You, not in the you-who-ever-you-may-be sense, but you in the particular you-who-are-now-reading sense. Yes, some of your thoughts are ugly. I didn't say bad, as in 'I want to kill white people'. But ugly, as in 'what's wrong with her face'.

Just thought you should know. It is about time that true friends, of which I am one, should start telling people about their ugliness. Now the fact that I don't run away from you or laugh at you makes it ok for me to say that some of your thoughts are ugly. But it is ok, it isn't what is on the inside that counts. The way you look is what really matters. Be thankful, because your thoughts aren't very good looking.

Now I know this because some of my thoughts are ugly. Like this one about your ugly thoughts. So I assume that if some of my thoughts are ugyl, then yours are too.

Here is my latest ugly thought: I think blood is spicy.
 4:39 PM   •  7 satisfied customers!!  

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I was under a delussion. I thought that somehow I would make a difference in the world. Is this common? My previous goal of world changing action wouldn't be satisfied by helping a few people or impacting a small group of people; no 'Mr. Holland's Opus' for me, thank you. I wanted the real thing. I wanted to be known for being great. Is this normal?

Now, I don't really want to do that anymore. You know what, this earth is unfixable. UNFIXABLE! Who can make straight what God has made crooked? So why do I want to do something great? If it won't fix anything, what is the point? Well, there are tons of selfish reasons to do something great. But those aren't as appealing to me as they once were.

Now I want to be the opposite of great. An unrecognized slave sounds more appealing these days.
 10:30 AM   •  8 satisfied customers!!  

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There were these feet. The sort of feet you want to say, "Hey, cover up those feet." Of course, I didn't say a thing. But it did ruin my bagel. The lady looked nice, but she just had the sort of feet you want to keep a secret. She was wearing sandles, hardly the appropriate footwear for such feet. I guess nobody ever told her. I probably should have.


 4:26 PM   •  7 satisfied customers!!  

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Who said, "The world can be divided between two types of people: those who eat at delis and those who don't."?
 2:35 PM   •  6 satisfied customers!!  

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Then he said, "After we die, we will live on in other's memories of us." At this point my Grandpa put down his hot dog. *(for those of you just tooning in, I was telling about the time my grandpa broke his tooth)*
"Live in others memories of us? Are you retard? (my grandpa wasn't politically correct)"
The humble gentleman firmly and respectfully replied with, "Sir, haven't you heard that after you die you live in other's memories of you?"
"I've heard of it, but I never believed it. The only people who believe that sort of crap are those who don't want to admit that death will ruin them and everything they ever did or tried to do."
When the nice gentleman began to retort, my grandpa lost his cool (not that he had much) and started barking all sorts of unfortunatley accurate insults about the man and all his ilk. The barking ended when one of his canines stopped bouncing on the floor.

Ad hominems, though not great arguments, can be astonishingly true.
 10:01 PM   •  4 satisfied customers!!  

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Big argument with some joker. I can't believe this guy. He was trying to convince me that we should ban women. He was some big environmentalist from Northern Cali. His main argument was that women use too much paper products. They use more tissue than men, since they wipe after they pee. They use all sorts of paper products for their menstration. By the way, I appologize for the graphic nature of this post, but there isn't any way of candy coating it. All in all, he claims we would have a lot more trees and clean air if women were banned.

At first I didn't know how to respond. My wife was crying (she felt guilty and ashamed). I started to boil. I yelled, " yeah, well I think women are more important than trees." He looked at me so perplexed. It didn't make sense to him. So I mooned him.
 9:40 AM   •  14 satisfied customers!!  

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It isn't fair. You can't say that long term welfare recievers are unemployed. Quite the contrary! They are professional voters. They get paid to not work and vote Democrat year after year. Now I would like to hand it to the Democrates, this is briliant. Disguise the purchase of office with charity. This is almost as smart as the Republican's manipulation of Christianity to get votes.

And in case you were wondering, I'm still truckin'.
 7:02 PM   •  7 satisfied customers!!  

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I feel my mind being washed --washed by advertising. But wait, I'm not dogging it. In fact, I would like to take this opportunity to praise American brain washing. Since we allow competition, my mind is being washed and rewashed day in and day out. Coke, then Pepsi, then Coke, then Pepsi. (And for you grammer snobs, sentences with subjects and no predicates are acceptible now. So don't mentally ding me for a boof.) No single corporation or ideology can control me. I am being tossed back and forth by conpeteing products and ideologies. This is great! Instead of being lead to my doom by one all powerful mind controler, I'm crashing and becoming useless. Data is conflicting in my brain and the interface is freezing up. Now I stare at the wall and drool. And loving it!
 10:16 PM   •  7 satisfied customers!!  

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My main gripe with public education: it keeps people immuture for too long. In ages past, people in their teens were working like adults. Today, they are just big kids, totally irresponsible, totally immuture. The reason: we force them to be kids by forceing them to go to school. Some make good use out of high school, and they would probably choose to go since they have some foresight. But not all kids are this way. Most don't want to be there and will do everything they can to nulify thier education. They know they can't be flunked. They know they will graduate no matter what they do. So they do nothing. I did nothing. My friends did nothing. We graduated never doing any homework, studying for any tests, and ditching lots and lots of classes. So don't give me any of that 'education is the key' crap. What is wong with a 15 year old kid who couldn't care less about Dickens and Egyptian history working in an auto shop? If he loves cars, he will probably do good. By the time he is 20 he will be making 40 grand a year. That ain't too shabby. So why give him an 'education' that he will ignore? Why waste taxpayer money on people like me? It is silly. But we are so used to the rhetoric about the value of public education. We are so ingraned with some crappy idea that education is a right and not a privledge. We have some how equated compulsory education with freedom. We are the products of government run mind control. We are the products of public education. A vote for optional education is a vote for freedom.
 9:29 AM   •  18 satisfied customers!!  

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High school is early retirement. What a life. You are fit, smart, and able to learn anything an adult can do, but you don't have to. All you do is hang out and think only of the moment. Life has no consequences, except the occasional venareal disease or driving accident. Other than that, and they are so rare you have no fear of them happening to you, life is eternal. Life seems eternal because you have never gotten old. All you know is life without responsiblilities. How else can you know that you will get old until it happens? Age is just a dog on a chain that only snarls and never gets close enough to bite. Until it bites.

What a country, where those most able to work get a four year vacation with the possibility of another four year extension.
 9:33 AM   •  8 satisfied customers!!