The Audio Stylings of Chris Levens
"I'm a Gangster"

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Don't be alarmed: pagens will act, surprisingly, like pagens.

Now that it is all cleared up, we can stop acting all goofy in our attempt to make pagens act like something they aren't.
 3:51 PM   •  6 satisfied customers!!  

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The worst part about always being under the gun is that when the gun is removed one doesn't know what to do with oneself.
 10:05 PM   •  1 satisfied customer!  

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The only excuse for making a usless thing is that one . .. . . ..
 8:53 PM   •  6 satisfied customers!!  

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Love is not in the heart.
Irrational infatuation is in the heart.
The head has rational appreciation.
Love is found at the intersection of the heart's irrational infatuation and the heads rational appreciation.
And it is quite possible that other organs, glands and nodes have something to do with love also.
But to limit love to just the heart is, ... . well, .. . it just isn't right.
 1:48 PM   •  5 satisfied customers!!  

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Crime and Freedom are mutually exclusive.

Crime, in its most general sense, is the breaking of a law. A law, by definition, limits freedom. Freedom is the lack of restraint. So, if there is a crime, there is a law. If there is a law, there is not freedom. If there is freedom, there is no law. If there is no law, there is no crime.

I hate to break things down to syllogisms -- it's so crass.
 11:56 AM   •  6 satisfied customers!!  

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Cruel and unusual punishment .. . .
 11:30 AM   •  4 satisfied customers!!  

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This just in: use of the word "pundit" has just passed the overused mark. Local and State representatives are putting their heads together as we speak to try and solve this most terrible problem. The situation is spinning out of control. Overuse of the word is already making millions of users look like fools. A solution must be found before overuseage starts to drive cool people crazy. A flurry of mockery and spite are mounting.

The Senate sub-committee on the issue is asking for the public's support. If you or anyone you know who uses this word, please, do you part and help them stop. Bring a thesarus with you, or just copy the page with the word 'pundit.' Your help is desperatly needed.
 4:18 PM   •  1 satisfied customer!  

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The T-shirt that made me happy, and the guy who wore it.
By Johnny T.

As I pull up in the parking spot I notice the guy who will make me happy. He looks about 20, oily dishwater blond hair, a moustache under construction, black t-shirt and dark blue-jeans, a face that betrays a love of motor sports, playing pool and soda. Was it his face?
He takes a drag off of his smoke as he watches me pull into the spot. Then he turns around. I see the print on his black shirt: florecent pastels (touquise, magenta, and yellow) of a street bike (rice-rocket) taking a corner at top speeds. So what? That's right. So what until I read the caption under the bike: I will not tiptoe through life.

After finishing the caption he turns around to look at me. His face is serious. He is serious. He turns back around. I read it again. I think to myself, "Is he serious?" He turns around again to show me that he is.

Jackpot! A smile for the next 1/2 hour and a mission that will keep me at the swapmeets for months--I need to find that shirt!
 1:47 PM   •  4 satisfied customers!!  

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Enjoy Red Bull before it becomes illegal.


 8:13 AM   •  4 satisfied customers!!  

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My wife: "what is Bush talking about? We are a nation of perverts. Why is he trying to invent this image of America as a land of the pure?"

Upon hearing my wife's un-patriotic editorial, several things flashed through my mind/body:

I'm so proud of her
I hope I'm not corrupting her
Great point --I didn't even think of that!
I wonder if I got any CDs in the mail today?
 9:26 AM   •  4 satisfied customers!!  

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Self-evident my foot. If the rights that we Americans enjoy are really self-evident, then why don't we extend these rights to all the people in world that we deal with? For example, those poor chaps at Gwantanamo (spelling?) Bay. If the principles our justice system are based on are truly self-evident, then are we sinning against nature to withhold these self-evident rights from non-American humans?

| My point might be easily missed. This is not a call to hold more strongly to these self-evident truths. Quite the opposite, in fact. As someone who doubts the authentisity of these so-called "self-evident" rights, I think cases like Gwantanamo Bay show that America doesn't really bellieve in these self-evident rights either. All that mumbo-jumbo is just cleaver verbage to capture the hearts and minds of the citizenry. It is much easier to contol a people when they think that they are a righteous people, in line with the laws of nature, and the keepers of truths and rights that are self-evident to all and surpressed by evil dictators.

When the citizens of a country see themselves in this light, it is easy to get their support to oust evil governments that sin against laws and rights that are self-evident, written on the fabric of nature. Our role as the only enlightened country is to enforce these laws where they are being neglegted. Or so the thinking goes --and often goes on behind the cognative scenes.

A key to freedom from such ideological tyranny starts with pooping on the whole idea that there are a whole host of self-evident truths and rights out there that we need to discover and obey. Once you are free from this, it just might happen that the whole system starts to unravil.
 10:00 PM   •  1 satisfied customer!