I don't care for interviews. I am a confident speaker, and I believe in me. I can speak in front of hundreds and hundreds of people just fine, but as soon as you sit down one person who is judging me for ME... it unnerves me.

I don't like being judged for that matter, but who really does? I don't tend to get nervous when speaking very often. The only time is when I am being interviewed. And yes, that goes not only for job interviews, but with the ladies. I just start blanking out when it comes me turn to speak, and when I finally squirt some ideas out my piehole, they're allllll jibberjabber.

I realized this twice today. And so now that I have you here, Mr. Internet, I just want to let you know a few things. I could KICK ASS at the job I interviewed for this morning. But I sat down in front of him and felt like I was 5 years old getting questioned about who broke the God damned lamp. Previously, I spoke with Sam the sweet breakfast server again. Once again, I don't think she'll be calling. Why? Because every time I get around to the "call me sometime" part of the conversation, it comes out at the volume of 1 as something along the lines of "cah-me sumt-... sometime ifyerbored......."

CONFIDENCE, YOU ASSHOLE!!! I KNOW YOU HAVE IT!!! EXUDE IT TO THOSE WHOM IT MATTERS MOST!!!

Sometimes, Llama, you're such a dick to yourself.

In other news... Jane, you ignorant slut, the lyric is "if you ever live there, you just listen and don't be no fool." Live there, not "lither"

What does that even MEAN??

Also, being sober and not smoking makes me cranky. But I can do this, I swear.

It's about 5 weeks in now, and I am starting to realize that moving across the country was a bigger deal than I had originally anticipated.

I don't know what caused me to believe that it wouldn't be in the first place, to tell you the honest-to-God truth here. But job finding and friend hunting has been fucking hard! In other news, I really, really, re-he-heeallly want to go back to school. I'm past ready again. I need moneys to do it though. That makes me a sad panda.

However, I am loving my new location. While it may be fucka-cold, I am digging living on the beach. Jersey may get a bad rap, but if you are one of the assholes giving it one, I'm gonna give you a GOOD rap... right on the fuckin' noggin.

Hey also, I seem to be back. Maybe I won't be such a dick and I'll actually keep posting this time, instead of leading you to believe so and then crushing your hopes of my promised wordsmithing. (And I also still don't make much sense apparently. Ta da!!)